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Home –› Self Help –› Addiction Recovery
 

Dysfunctional Characteristics are Inherent in All of Us, More so the Addict and Gambler - SHAME is I

 
Author: John Tully
 

These traits result from being raised in an environment that hindered emotional growth. Regardless of economic situations, children were emotionally deprived, neglected or traumatised in some way, or they were so indulged or overprotected that they never learned to cope with or properly tolerate frustration, anger, stress or disappointments.

While we are all self-absorbed to some extent, gamblers are more narcissistic. Although it is easy to become angry and frustrated with them, we need to recognise that their narcissism is a way of coping with SHAME - feeling helpless, hopeless, powerless and unworthy - anger, rage, fear and the hurt they experienced in childhood.

Gamblers and addicts of all sorts have some of the following narcissistic characteristics.

Grandiosity; expect and need to be recognised as special

Expoitative tendencies; use people to meet their own needs

Poor reaction to criticism; eagerly seek approval, avoid confrontations

Sense of entitlement; feel they should get special attention from everyone

Recurrent fantasies of unlimited success; as a substitute for the hard work necessary for achievement

Chronic feelings of envy; what they have is never enough, envious of those who have more

Lacking in empathy; do not recognise how others are feel

Craving attention and admiration; display vanity, exhibition, showing off

Feelings of uniqueness; think that no-one could understand them

All or nothing tendencies; everything is either good or bad, no in between.

 
 
 

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